Review: The Heat

30 Jun

MV5BNDheat

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationIf you’re looking for cool entertainment on a hot summer’s day–you can’t beat The Heat! (See what I did there?)

Ike2Take it easy, Rex Reed.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationCome on! That’s blurb gold!

Ike2“Blurb gold” sounds like the premium version of a really bad product. “Try new Gutter Gold cigarette butts. All the flavor of Gutter Silver–but fifty percent less soggy!”

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationYou’ll thank me when our names show up on a billboard.

Ike2I’ll thank you to get on with the review.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationLet’s start by saying that Melissa McCarthy is a comic treasure.

Ike2In The Heat, Melissa McCarthy is one hunka-hunka burnin’ funny! (See what I did there?)

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationYeah, that’s pretty good.

Ike2The Heat‘s Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy are a combustible comic duo!

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationOkay…

Ike2The Heat is a generic title that will set critics ablaze with the burning desire to pun!

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationThat’s enough now.

Ike2Okay, on to the obligatory plot summary.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationWho needs a plot summary? It’s a buddy movie about two female cops. The plot details are as ersatz and meaningless as the title.

Ike2You know, you might have more friends if you didn’t use words like ‘ersatz.’ The important thing is, the movie is really, really funny.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationIt’s no coincidence it comes from the people who gave us Bridesmaids. As predictable as the plot is, the comedy consistently surprises, and it’s absolutely relentless. Comedically, there’s hardly a slow moment in the movie.

Ike2 Even the dramatic moments are just breathers. Every time I’d think, okay, here comes the poignant piano—boom, we get the comedy curveball.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationThat is one unholy mixed metaphor.

Ike2At least you can’t say it was ‘ersatz.’

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationI won’t.

Ike2Or ‘ jejune.’ If you say ‘jejune,’ I’ll bite you.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationI’m not saying ‘jejune’—Ow! That was a dirty trick!

Ike2Man, you are too easy!

SherryIcon2Hey, boys.

Ike2Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationHi, Sherry…

SherryIcon2Are you playing nice?

Ike2Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationYes…

SherryIcon2See that you do–or else no popcorn when we see “The Lone Ranger!”

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationHa-Ha. Are we really going to see that thing?

SherryIcon2For real!  Even without popcorn I’m hyped for this one. I admit I’m not too sure about Johnny Depp as Tonto.  Nice bird-hat, though. G’night!

Ike2Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationG’night!

Ike2That reminds me. One thing I learned from this movie is—Hollywood needs women!

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationAbsolutely. I enjoyed This Is the End, for example, but it has about six times the number of comics—

Ike2Male comics—

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart Illustration—and maybe half the laughs. Oh—like Mars Needs Women. I just got that. Good one.

Ike2Not to knock all the great male comics out there, but the boys club is getting tired.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationThe lack of female-driven pictures in Hollywood is an on-going problem, but I’m hoping we’re seeing the beginning of a new trend. One interesting thing about The Heat is how, on the one hand, it’s about women fighting for their place in a male-dominated world, but on the other hand, it’s funny just because it’s funny.

Ike2You mean, it’s not funny just because of the gimmick—“Oh look, two women acting like cops!” It’s funny because of what they do with it.

Happy Red Haired Freckled Boy With Missing Front Teeth, Laughing Retro Clipart IllustrationRight. Funny script. Expert direction. Great performances.

Ike2Hot stuff!

Our Review:

Forgettable plot, but no one will care.

Comedy curveballs a-plenty.

Bullock and McCarthy are a dynamic comic duo.

We Want Women!

Four tail wags out of five.

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3 Responses to “Review: The Heat”

  1. Darlene June 30, 2013 at 11:34 pm #

    Hi Ike and Mike,
    Glad to hear you fellers liked “The Heat.” For a while there I thought you might not give women their props–Glad to hear you don’t need babylicious females doing impossible sexual contortions just for the sake of a favorable shout out. My boyfriend and I both liked “The Heat.” We thought it was as funny as last summer’s “Ted.” And that’s saying something. During the whole movie, the guy seated next to us was giggling and kicking the seat, like almost blowing a gasket because he was laughing so hard. Heck, we were, too.

  2. Eldridge June 30, 2013 at 11:50 pm #

    What happened to the cat? I thought he added something.

    • Lucas S. July 1, 2013 at 12:44 am #

      Yep, definitely the cat added something. I’m a cat fancier myself and want to see a lot more cat stuff. I’m just saying…

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